Snapshots of Life!

Excuse me Miss, are you Singaporean?

There's a huge group of "displaced" foreign talent population who are living and working in Malaysia but without the "right employment paperwork". I attribute this to the inefficiency of the Immigration Department because if we really waited for that to come through, half the length of my internship would be over by then. I guess that does make many of us illegal workers though I must reiterate that it's not by choice.

I was writing to Julia (who is in Germany on a traineeship) today and told her that "sometimes I forget that I am on a year long internship in Malaysia" living the AIESEC experience. Perhaps it would have been different if I had gone to places like Brasil, Russia or Azerbajian - where I would have been shocked out of my Asian-ness. In fact, I travel back to Singapore every month to see my family and get my social visit pass extended, so it's unlike my last AIESEC experience in India when I was really thrown into the deep end and couldn't "escape home".

People often ask "which country are you from?" The most popular guesses are that I am from Hong Kong. When I say I'm from Singapore...it kinda leaves people confused as to why I am on a traineeship in Malaysia since part of the point of a traineeship is to gain a wider world view and a cultural experience.

Unlike what most people think...yes, you can culture shock in Malaysia even if you are Singaporean. A simile would be an Canadian getting culture shock in the States. It's subtle but it's there... Only separated by a 1 mile long bridge and 6 hrs by bus from KL to Singapore. We're connected in so many ways and yet I feel the differences in my bones. And this is despite the fact that I'm no longer clear on what it means to be Singaporean anymore.

For some reason, I considered myself Singaporean up till when I was 19 years old. Unfortunately, I think I had bubble-wrap around my eyes and had a very narrow view of the world. Then I left to study abroad and I think it was at that moment when I discovered my ethnicity - Chinese and simply considered myself Asian.

When I was in India, it was the first time I realized how americanized I had become. (note: I don't say westernized because the europeans behave differently from the americans) I think it was at that point my nationality - being Singaporean ceased to hold any meaning for me. It used to perplex me at AIESEC Global Villages when we had to run country booths - I didn't know if I was supposed to stand at the table where the Singaporean, Chinese or American flag was flying. Perhaps the rest of my friends were just as confused because we ran around the village all day in our MI t-shirts swearing allegiance to none. What happened next was that people then thought MICHIGAN was a country. LOL! Seriously, ask anyone who was at IC 2005 in India. We actually had people come up to us asking if Michigan was a country in Asia. :)

Even now when I am in Malaysia, I don't know if I have reclaimed my "Singaporean identity". I don't know what that is or means. Now that I've met people who've repeatedly challenged my assumptions on nationalistic and ethnic identity...I realized I can't look at a person based on the passport they hold or place they were born.

In an increasingly globalized world, I think the idea that you can "know" a person based on their nationality or ethnic origin is weakening. If anyone told me "you're so Singaporean", they'll probably just get a blank stare from me.

Sometimes I'm envious of people who can still claim their identity based on a country flag or national origin. I wish I had that much pride (and an understanding of what it means) in declaring myself "Singaporean" as I have seen my friends done in the past when they said they were "Brazilian", "Colombian", "Puerto Rican" or "Indian".

*sigh*

If only there were aliens out there, a typical conversation would go like this:

Alien: Where are you from?
Me: Planet Earth, if you know where Mars is...yeah, we're next to it. Yup, that one.
Alien: Oh yes, I've been there before....

Until then, I'll just consider myself as Asian.

posted by Li'er @ 12:08 AM